I had set a HUGE business goal to retire my husband from the corporate retail management job that he hated. I anticipated this goal for two years as I worked HARD in my online coaching business. The day came where he put in his 2 week notice, and we were over the moon excited!
I DID IT!!!!!!
I worked hard enough for TWO years, and now we were going to have him home with us every day - every morning when the kids woke up, working as a team with the kids and housework, no more evenings / late nights without him home, no more feeling like a single mom...doing it all! We MISSED him as he was working 60+ hours per week. During his last 2 weeks at work, I kept envisioning how amazing life was going to be. I was going to have my best friend and love of my life home with me every day...omg!
Then, the day came where he didn't have to go into work. My overthinking brain started to panic: Him leaving his job meant a $90k per year pay cut - could I really support our family by myself? I mean...he was going to help me in my online coaching business, but was he going to LIKE coaching as much as I do? Where would his spot be in this business I called "mine" for 2 years?
It felt like the weight of the WORLD was sitting like an elephant on my chest. I remember being in the car, driving to Best Buy to buy him a new laptop to work from home on, and I felt dizzy and felt like I was having a full blown heart attack. I made him pull over so I could walk around a parking lot and breathe. He called my Dr's office, and they told me to come into the office.
When I arrived at the Dr's office, my blood pressure was high, and RESTING heart rate was 145. The Dr. did an ECG, and my heart was fine. She diagnosed me with "Panic disorder" and prescribed me a low dose of Zanax. She also sent me for bloodwork. The bloodwork showed I had abnormally high levels of the cortisol (stress) hormone which was the cause of my anxiety and panic attacks.
Since then, I've struggled with anxiety and weight gain. Both of which can be a result of high cortisol.
I do try my best to control my cortisol levels without the need for medication by limiting caffeine, alcohol, sugar, and processed foods, but I'm also human and like to live a life of balance.
I realized this morning (Day 11) that I have not felt any bit of anxiety within the last 8 days. Many changes are happening within during the detoxification process, and I just FEEL my cortisol levels are where they are supposed to be - which means I'm finally losing weight AND my anxiety is gone!
I asked hubby: "So, this is what it is like to live an "anxiety free" life?"
His response: "Welcome to feeling like ME every day of my life" #suchasmartass lol
PS - I no longer have anxiety about Nick being home. It's everything I anticipated, plus more! <3 Sure, we have our ups and downs, but overall, we work well juggling everything as a team, and he's helped me grow "our" business even more. We are passionate about helping people better themselves and build their dreams <3
Today's breakfast: Fruit plate - I blended it this morning with a few ice cubes and a little mineralized water...and drank it in a wine glass because...well, drinking breakfast on the porch with a wine glass just seemed appropriate. ;)
Today's Lunch: Quinoa and stir fried garlic veggies - so simple, yet this meal is something I will continue to eat after the Reset! Yummy and satisfying! I still don't miss meat! :)
Tonight's dinner: Hearty vegetable miso soup. I had high hopes for the soup since I loved the other 2 soups, but this one was just EH! Not terrible, but also not the best thing I've ever had! And, I couldn't eat the quinoa by itself, so I just ate the soup :)
How I'm feeling: I was actually a little tired today! I slept great last night and woke up with a TON of morning energy. Blending my fruit this morning wasn't the best idea - I think I underestimated the amount of fruit I was supposed to eat. Then, I did yoga (which I'm obsessed with if you didn't gather that from my previous posts haha). I think I underestimated the amount of food I needed for lunch too and was too lazy to make more lol! I felt the lack of (food) energy, and I took a nap. I NEVER take naps. But, it was an amazing nap :) Looking forward to another great day tomorrow <3
Stay tuned for my Day 12 Review...
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